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Before | After

This was definitely the most active fan fiction year I've had in a very long time. A lot of people know that when my twin sister died some years ago, my creativity sort of died as well -- I've participated in Yuletide and made vids, but it's been a serious struggle to write. Downright agonizing. But I've plugged along, writing something outside of Yuletide for the first time last year when I wrote a little Loki & Pepper Avengers story.

And it was the same kind of year, going along, making vids, until July happened. I didn't expect it, but man did I fall hard for Pacific Rim. I was just obsessed, still am, and it's been weird, because I don't know anyone else in the fandom with my pairing interest that I can spend time around talking about it, or anyone who's at the obsesso level I still am at. I'm the kind of person who really needs to squee with people. Still, I have a third part of a story kind-of series coming up, and more vids I want to make, and I guess you could say Pacific Rim changed my life, because suddenly, for the first time since my sister died, I felt like I could create, I felt the overwhelming DESIRE to create, particularly in writing. I can't tell you how monumental that feeling has been, and I wish I could share it with people.

Anyways, here's my year in fan works review, starting with fic, from Yuletide backwards:

C'est la Guerre (3587 words) by gwyneth rhys
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: The Unit
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Mack Gerhardt/Gael
Characters: Mack Gerhardt, Jonas Blane, Gael, Hector Williams
Additional Tags: Post-Episode: Inside Out, Hurt/Comfort, Comfort Sex, Confessions, Implied Mack/Jonas

After the episode Inside Out, Mack seeks out Gael for a little post-mission comfort.

I wrote this as a treat because I was really intrigued by the prompt from the recipient, who was one of the only other people who requested The Unit. I didn't even remember the other character's name or episode, but when I watched it again, I was all, "Oh yeah, that's really slashy right there." And I hate that the show never ever addressed Mack's torture and the effects it would have had on him as an operator. They completely toss it off like it was nothing. So I thought that needed dealing with, and also, I love sad, broken people having comfort sex and finding a little tenderness in a world without any.

The Hot Dad Mix Tape (3928 words) by gwyneth rhys
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: The Unit
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Characters: Mack Gerhardt, Jonas Blane, Hector Williams, Charles Grey, Bob Brown, Original Character
Additional Tags: Rescue, Missions, Father-Daughter Relationship, Crush

Mack can handle a lot of tough situations, but a teenage girl might be too much for him this time.

I had a tougher time with my main assignment this year, because my recipient didn't have a letter and there were few if any details other than a love for the character of Mack. Which, fortunately, is something I share! One of the things I love about Mack is that he's a dad, and a really hot one, and the few times we get to see him be one, he's not a bad dad at all, so I thought it would be fun to put him with a girl about one of his daughters' age and see what happens. If I'd been a teenage girl rescued by him, I'd have positively swooned.

The Gift of Forgetfulness (6049 words) by gwyneth rhys
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Pacific Rim (2013)
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Hercules Hansen/Stacker Pentecost, Chuck Hansen & Hercules Hansen
Characters: Hercules Hansen, Stacker Pentecost, Chuck Hansen, Tendo Choi, Mako Mori
Additional Tags: Grief/Mourning, Loss, Child Loss, Road Trips, Cage Fights, self-punishment, Drift Bond, The Drift (Pacific Rim), Eventual Happy Ending, Team Hot Dads, drivesuit scars

He’ll not be anybody’s fucking tragic hero who lost his son and his best friend and still won the fight.

I think this is one of the best things I've ever written, frankly, and I love some of the turns of phrase I came up with, and the character development. I was inspired by some gifsets on Tumblr to think about Herc after the movie, after losing his son and his dearest friend (and to my mind, lover), and, well, grief is one of the things I know best in this world. I actually loved writing this, even though it brought back a lot of memories and emotions I try to avoid.

Island Time (7005 words) by gwyneth rhys
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Pacific Rim (2013)
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Hercules Hansen/Stacker Pentecost
Characters: Hercules Hansen, Stacker Pentecost
Additional Tags: R&R, Idyll Challenge, tropical island, First Time, Life During Wartime, Australia, Friends to Lovers, Team Hot Dads, Swimming, Drift Bond

Herc and Stacker take some R&R. Too bad Stacker doesn't know how to relax. Written for the Idyll Challenge.

Margie set up an Idyll Challenge collection in AO3, after a discussion about idyll stories we have known and loved, and at first I felt kind of weird thinking of a Pacific Rim story for an idyll, but as others pointed out, the Hot Dads need some down time too. Setting it in the early days of the kaiju war meant they could go for R&R and discover each other without having a lot of the war experience interfering with their sexytimes.

All They Had Seen and All They Had Lost (6808 words) by gwyneth rhys
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Pacific Rim (2013)
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Hercules Hansen/Stacker Pentecost
Characters: Herc Hansen, Stacker Pentecost, Mako Mori, Chuck Hansen
Additional Tags: Missing Scene, Comrades in Arms, Friendship/Love, Team Hot Dads

Herc and Stacker, in the spaces in between the movie.

This was the first PR story I wrote, and I was still feeling my way around a new obsession. But I always love thinking about what happens in between scenes in a movie or a TV show, and there was just SO MUCH stuff that isn't shown in the film about Stacker and Herc's very obvious relationship to each other, and it wasn't hard to fill in the missing pieces. (Also, I think there's something about Max Martini and his intense hoyay, because this is the second time I've been inspired by what were clearly missing scenes in a work he was starring in -- Numb3rs being the other one. Dude just screams, "something is going on behind the scenes.")


I've been really bad this year about posting my vids to AO3, so I'll just link to the posts at Dreamwidth.

Artist: Imagine Dragons
Fandom: Pacific Rim
Welcome to the new age: go big or go extinct.

I have a million vid ideas and a bunch of vids I've been trying to do, and I have no idea why I wasted time detouring to do this, but of all the insane fandoms that this song has been (often totally inappropriately) vidded to, there wasn't a single full-length one for Pacific Rim that did anything remotely like what this song feels like. So I just had to go ahead and make the version I saw in my head every time I heard the song, because apparently no one else was gonna!

How You Like Me Now
Artist: The Heavy
Fandom: Iron Man/Avengers
Summary: Tony Stark is the little black dress of the Avengersverse.

I had a lot of fun with this vid. I was convinced someone had to have done this song for Tony, but I couldn't find one. It just seemed so perfect for him, and his relationships with all the people he's shipped with throughout fandom.

Red Rain
Fandom: Miami Vice
Artist: Peter Gabriel
Summary: Sonny Crockett's life is basically just one long terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day.

I have wanted to make this vid since I started vidding like, I don't know, 15, 16 years ago? You guys, Sonny suffers so much, and so prettily.

Pick Up the Phone
Fandom: Awake
Artist: The Notwist
"If you're telling me that the price of seeing them, feeling them...of having them in my life is my sanity, then that's a price I will happily pay."

I really wanted to have a vid to bring to Vidukon, especially since I was afraid I might never be able to go again. I'd been thinking a lot about Awake since it ended, and found this song on my playlist one day and thought they were a perfect match (even though you can't hear the lyrics well). I was really surprised and pleased by how many people grokked this vid without knowing anything about the source.

Worth Fighting For
Artist: Santigold (Disparate Youth)
Fandom: Avengers-verse
If we go, we go together.

Despite the ginormous technical difficulties I had making this, and thus not being able to make the vid I wanted to make at all, I still like this. It captured my intense feelings about the Avengers as a team, and what they've been through to make it to that movie and create that team. I have a thing for teamy stuff, if you couldn't already tell. ;-)

So, rather strangely, I didn't post my Festivid in my journals, and I completely forgot to make a signed version and put it up on any of my sites. I wonder if it's too late for that? ;-) I did post a signed version on my YouTube channel, I guess, but forgot about the rest of it.

Gray Goes Black
Fandom: Miracles (2003)
Music: Gray Goes Black by Mark Lanegan Band
Summary: The blood we're sinking in.
Content notes: Physical triggers (e.g., epilepsy or migraine: strobe lights, bright lights, "stuttery" cuts between 2-3 stills), disturbing imagery, gore, violence

And I guess that's it? Not too bad for someone who's had such a hard time creating.


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Jan. 2nd, 2014 03:26 am (UTC)
I am so happy that you're feeling creative! May 2014 double and double you again! :D
Jan. 2nd, 2014 04:23 pm (UTC)
Wow you've been ridiculously productive!
Jan. 2nd, 2014 05:51 pm (UTC)
Falling headlong into a new fandom feels amazing. Fringe did that for me. I hope that streak continues for both of us!
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Out of the past

May 2017

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