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Meme end of days

Augh, behind again, but since it's almost the end of the prompts, I don't think it matters much.

[personal profile] chelletoo asked: what convention plans do you have for 2014?

I'm going to Escapade in February, as usual. These days it's more of a chance to see some people; I almost never go to panels anymore because there is never anything I'm interested in, and nothing I ever nominate gets voted for to be included, so it's more of a chance to socialize and be in southern California during one of the worst parts of the year up here in Seattle. We're going down early to Palm Springs and Joshua Tree. Then in April it will be time for Bitchin' Party, aka Pacificon. I rarely go to panels there, either! But I do sit in on one or two. But I mean, it's a con, here in Seattle, and I can go to it! And it's put on by very fun people! You should come! And then in August it will be time for Vividcon. I wish I could go to Vidukon again, but I have a feeling that is either not in the near future, or just may not ever happen again. Who knows. And I wish I could try one of the east coast cons, but traveling for fun and traveling for the other cons always kind of bumps into each other.

[personal profile] barkley said: You start a kickstarter fund to cast Max Martini in the latest adaptation of _____. What is it and why is it great for him? Alternate question: Beaches or Mountains?

Oh, I love this one! I spent the whole damn month thinking about it, and I could not for the life of me decide on anything. I think partly because I have yet to see a reboot or new adaptation of something that is any good (oh, no, wait -- Dredd. So OK, the Karl Urban Dredd is light years better than the hideous version with Stallone. I stand corrected). I mean, I liked the Trek reboot at first, but over time that soured for me a lot and the second one actively pissed me off, and that was pretty much the only time I've ever liked a new version of something. And I don't even want to think of the adaptations and reboots of other things. And even when a new version of something starts out great, like the Chris Nolan version of Batman, which I liked so much better than Tim Burton's? They turn bad -- I do not even have the ability to talk about how much I hated The Dark Knight Rises. It turns me incomprehensible with rage.

But that said, when I saw that Max's name was on the shortlist for the new version of Batman, I might have squeed just a little. Partly it was cool to see him finally get some recognition for a change (because Batman! Might mean he wouldn't have to do cheesy Lifetime movies all the time! And play villains on CBS procedurals!), and partly it was because, ya know, he would have made an awesome Bats. A really really awesome one, and he wouldn't even have to do the Christian Bale Batman voice -- his voice is naturally low and sexy and gravelly anyway! But he's a great physical actor, and he never really gets to show his range because of the roles he gets, so yeah, it would have been cool to see him as Batman, back then in Batman Begins or in the new ones.

And right now he's too old for a lot of the things I'd love to see him as an adaptation of things that haven't been made before, like The Dreyfuss Affair. Although when 60-year-old Liam Neeson suddenly becomes an action hero, or Harrison Ford's playing action heros well into his 60s, maybe there is no such thing as too old anymore? I don't know.

But for some reason, that got me thinking about one of my all-time favorite movies. I would not really want to see a new adaptation of Escape from New York, because I'm just not sure that anything new could really capture what made that movie so much fun and so beloved. I see the trailers for the new Robocop, and it's just...devoid of any of the things that made the original so great. They've made crucial alterations that gut the premise of the story and I'm pretty sure it's going to be awful. So I have zero faith that a new version would be any good, but goddamn, Max would make an awesome Snake Plissken. Just so, so awesome. He's in perfect physical shape for it, he has the voice, he'd look smashing with an eye patch, he can fight and he's a fabulous gun actor, and he can do dry, sardonic humor really really well. (That was always one of my favorite things about Mack on The Unit -- he had the best lines, especially when he was griping, which he did so creatively.)

So yeah, if someone really good could adapt Escape from New York for the 21st century, and it wouldn't totally suck all the best qualities of the movie out of it, I would love to see him be Snake. (And bonus for him, because he seems to love to get tons of trashy tattoos, so he could get the cobra for realz.) Imagine the casting, too, you could do with that: Idris Elba could be the Duke of New York, so they could work together again; the president could be genderswapped and played by someone like Sigourney Weaver; Gina Torres could play Maggie; Brain could be Orlando Jones (no, seriously, wouldn't he make an awesome Brain?); and Hauk could be Robert Patrick. I know, dream on. Whatever.

And beaches or mountains? I cannot choose. Which is why I live in Seattle despite the cold and the damp -- I have both within miles of my house. And I can see both from my neighborhood when I walk. But if I could live somewhere that's warm all the time, like Hawaii or southern California, it'd pretty much have to be beaches. Because there's nothing like being able to walk out on that warm sand and go into warm water and snorkel around.


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Dec. 29th, 2013 04:42 pm (UTC)
I'd like to see your remake of Escape from New York. That would totally kick ass! And I agree with your vacillation over mountains or beach. Unfortunately I can see neither from here. :(
Dec. 30th, 2013 08:34 am (UTC)
And Margo Martindale as Cabbie! Wouldn't that be AWESOME?

I think I would go mad if I were landlocked -- I have a friend who moved to Chicago and she loves it so much she would never move back here, and it made me roll my eyes. I just could not imagine preferring being landlocked!
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